When you think of your wedding ceremony, what do you envision?
This is an important question, sit with it and think on it and then write that down.
For me, I thought of walking down the longest aisle I could find and staring at my future all the while. I thought of standing next to my partner and telling him how much I loved him. I envisioned weepy eyes and all the emotions one could invoke.
What I got? Well...I got the longest aisle I could find, I did stare at my future the whole time, except I was wondering why he looked green and if he was okay (thank you to his big brother, those drinks the night before didn't sit so well lol). I got all the emotion because I was a crying blubbering mess. I mean the kind of mess where snot is running down your face, and no tissue in the world could be found, where you can hear me sniffle and sob - I mean good lord I couldn't hold it together for the life of me. We had a church wedding and discussed the ceremony with the Pastor. We stuck to tradition because I didn't have Pinterest and we were one of the first in our circle of friends to get married so we had nothing to compare to. We did light a unity candle which was sweet, but we did it because it was tradition, no other reason really.
And that's where I turn to you, today you have Pinterest, the internet for research and pictures and heck even full blown ceremonies can be found. But put all that aside, look at your answer, what do you see?
Maybe you see tradition also, and that's awesome. Perhaps you envision laughter and jokes during our wedding ceremony, heck to the yes! Maybe you want to incorporate our love of beer or outdoors or your joint passion for food - let's do all of that!
Your wedding ceremony can include a unity ceremony, readings, laughter, tears and so much more...or less. That's the point, your wedding ceremony can be a reflection of what you envision and how you see your wedding day beginning.
How to get married in Michigan
You've decided you want to get married, now what!
Getting married in Michigan is not difficult, but you do need to know the correct steps to follow in order to get legally married in Michigan.
Did you know that in order to make that marriage legal you must apply for and obtain a marriage license from you local county clerks office? Yep, that's right, you have to have a license to get married...seems crazy, but that's the way of it. Once you've got that marriage license it's only valid for 30 days, you must get married within that 30 day window or, that license expires and you have to apply for it all over again.
Next step, find someone to sign that marriage license. You can search www.weddingwire.com or www.theknot.com for local Officiant's who are ordained and can perform a legal wedding ceremony. When you reach out to these professional Officiants and Ministers be sure to ask, (1) are they available for your service (2) what are their fee's, all of them including travel and any extra's (3) make an appointment for a phone call so you can hear their voice and get a feeling for their personality, this way you can make sure this is the person you want to stand with, do they fit your vibe and your feeling for your day.
Now that you've hired your pro Officiant or Minister you can begin working with them to draft a wedding ceremony. That's right, it's their duty to write the ceremony with or for you, every Officiant does this a bit differently, myself I start with an initial questionnaire that you complete and then based on that questionnaire I can draft the ceremony and then email it to you for review and from there we work together to proof it and edit it until it's perfect for you.
Steps to apply for your marriage license:
Your walk down the aisle may look different than you first imagined but the person your meeting at the end of that aisle...we'll that's what it's all about.
It's a unique time to be planning a wedding...that's an understatement! Don't loose sight of the "why" you are planning a wedding. You're planning this wedding to marry the person you can't live the rest of your life without. You're planning this wedding to celebrate your love and solidify the beginning of the rest of your life together. So while you are busy planning focus on the why and perhaps the rest will fall into place a little more easily.
As we approach the colder months I encourage you to continue to follow the guidelines for indoor gatherings. Mask up, social distance and get married!
Latest covid gathering guidelines
I've been asked recently what the gathering guidelines are for weddings. Michigan Department of Health and Human Services has issued updated guidelines on gatherings, here is a direct link to their site: https://www.michigan.gov/coronavirus/0,9753,7-406-98178_98455-541962--,00.html
I know were all exhausted of hearing about masks and gatherings and guidelines. But, in order for me to keep my ordination I must follow those guidelines.
Basically, we can gather for your wedding but we have to wear a mask, weather we're indoors or out and socially distancing per household is still required. Venues still have some restrictions on capacity and number of people. See the link for details.
If you know me you know I'm a people pleaser, so hugs and accommodating people are what I do, but for now, I will best accommodate the safety and health of people by following the guidelines.
Stay safe and stay well.
Virtual xoxo, Nichole
marriage 101 - patience
I've been told often throughout my life that I don't have a lot of patience, so much so that I now repeat it. But...it's not really true. I have patience, I can tolerate a lot, but I have boundaries and expectations and sometimes those actions of others test my patience.
My husband, most would say is a very patient man, he is, but, he is also quiet and reserved, thus the appearance of patience is greater than the actual patience. I know this because I've seen the lack in action. Hey, we've been together for 25 years, I know him and he knows me, very well at this point.
In marriage, the patience you have and those that you see in others matters. But more so, recognizing the abilities of yourself and your partner matter's more. It doesn't matter the amount of patience you have, what matters is recognizing your abilities and those of your partner. Once you understand each other's thresholds and boundaries then you can begin to have more patience with each other.
Marriage doesn't take patience, it takes understanding or at least a want to understand. And time, marriage takes time, each day you recognize new things within yourself and your partner and it's that ability to know new things will be discovered that allows you to have patience, to understand you will each change, and during those changes you need to nurture yourself and each other.
Be kind to yourself and those around you, especially your partner, together you can do most things, with love and understanding you can do all things.
Wedding readings, how to
Do I have to have a reading in my wedding ceremony?
Love stories are my passion